You Can Lead a Horse to Water…
By 瑞秋 Annelise Chaney
You can lead a horse to water, but 你 can’t make him drink.
我们大多数人都听过很多次这个俗语——甚至可能在兄弟姐妹不接受我们的常识性建议时使用它. (好吧, 可能 be a scenario specific to me…) But, 知道一个短语和真正理解它并不总是一样的, as I quickly learned when I adopted a horse of my own.
大约十年前, in the sweltering heat of a Southern summer, I drove an off-track Thoroughbred on a long, bumpy ride from Lexington, 肯塔基州穿过西弗吉尼亚山脉到达北卡罗来纳. 带着我那匹四岁的骟马走出拖车的试探性的第一步, De Vedras, marked the beginning of an unexpected, unorthodox course in leadership.
大多数人买马是为了它们的美丽，为了骑马或比赛的快感. 但是，不管是什么引诱你来到养马的世界，马 将 teach 你 a thing or two about leadership. Most of the time, completely against 你r 将! It’s a lesson also learned by BRC’s Managing Partner, 洛里凯利, when she entered the unique world of horse ownership.
“We have a full house of pets,罗瑞带着半歉意的微笑说，这在忠诚的动物爱好者中很常见. “Five cats, a dog, a Shetland pony and two horses. Without question, dealing with horses is 大大 different from the house pets.”
Nothing 可以 be truer. 马是 不 大狗，不管它们多么爱表达，或者多么想住在你的口袋里. 与马一起工作的独特挑战将教会你很多东西, but they are waters that most people, 明智的, choose 不 to wade in.
例如, 你, 亲爱的读者, 也许你宁愿不要在潮湿的田野里抓一匹脾气暴躁的马，或者在大腿上十大网赌平台推荐一只沾满泥巴的蹄子, 手里拿着蹄锄, in below-freezing temperatures. 当然，要获得这些宝贵的领导智慧，还有更简单的方法. 好消息! 洛里和我已经为你航行了这些马的领导水域，并将自由地给予你以下的智慧:
1) You Can’t Force a Half-Ton Animal
2) Emotions Travel Down the Reins
3)阿尔法最后休息
You Can’t Force a Half-Ton Animal
Here’s a fun detail about horses: they’re big. 大多数都至少有半吨重，有许多甚至超过了半吨. 我受过严格训练的, De Vedras, 它比一般的马高几英寸，体重只有1磅,200磅.
I 将 reveal here that I do 不, 事实上, 体重超过1,200磅 and can不 outmuscle my horse.
从你站在马旁边的那一刻起，你就被期望用一根绳子控制半吨重的警觉肌肉, 你 realize how physically incapable 你 truly are. Your dog won’t come when 你 call? You can probably drag him on a leash. Your cat jumps on the counter? You can probably push her off.
Your horse decides to go the opposite direction from 你? Guess which way 你’re going…
德维德拉斯当然可以得到礼貌地称之为“任性”的东西，准确地说是“讨厌”的东西,当他这么做的时候, I have to handle the situation as safely as possible. 这是罗瑞在她自己的阿拉伯/四分之一的马Sully身上经历过的情况.
“他(萨利机长)并不害怕，但有时候，他只是不喜欢被人指挥. He’ll go: ‘Oh, 你 want me to do this or that? 细. I’m going to bring it.’”
那么，除了“不要惹大到能让你飞起来的动物”之外，还有什么教训呢??
尊重.
你可能是你的马的首领，牵着牵引绳、带着饲料袋和兽医账单. 但是你不能欺负、争论或强迫马听你的话. 如果你不培养一种相互信任和尊重的关系, 你’ve wasted a good bit of time and money.
Leadership Lesson #1: Always respect those 你 are leading.
Emotions Travel Down the Reins
关于马还有一个有趣的细节:它们对情绪非常敏感. 作为食肉动物，马总是对环境的任何变化或潜在的危险保持警惕. 这种警觉性也使他们对那些他们信任的人的情绪高度敏感.
如果你感到沮丧, 愤怒的, or just flat annoyed and hop in the saddle, 他们只会从你的坐姿或驾驭缰绳的方式中发现. 很有可能，它们会把你的情绪放大，如果你的情绪不好，那就祝你好运吧. (Yes, this is speaking from experience. PSA:在一个充满挑战的工作日之后，不要马上和你的马出去工作，除非你想让它故意甩尾巴.)
带一个收集好的, positive energy to the table (or stable, as it were) can prove to be the make or break of a good, productive day with 你r horse or a frustrating, 退一个. 正如洛里说得最好的:“你必须带着冷静的态度进去. 否则，不要这样做——你是在把自己和你的马置于失败的境地.”
在这个相互联系的时代，马的情感感知能力还有另一层含义. 分散注意力. Most of us are constantly bombarded with information: emails, 调用, 文本, social media 不ifications, 但是你不能在竞技场上策马猛冲并回答团队聊天. You can不 trot a horse over poles and take a client call.
我的意思是. 我想你可以试试，但如果你试了，请把结果报告给我.
对科学.
领导力课程之二:冷静地领导他人，把握当下.
阿尔法最后休息
Here’s a final fun detail for 你: horses like hierarchy. 每个群体都是不同的，有些群体的啄食顺序可能比其他群体波动更大. 但一般来说，总会有一匹意志最坚强的马，它是马群中的“阿尔法”.
But don’t go thinking about lone wolves here.
成为老大并不意味着成为最大的，最强的或者最坏的. 这甚至不意味着总是第一个得到食物或关注——尽管如果别人得到薄荷而他没有，我们群体中的老大肯定会生气!
No, being the alpha of the herd means looking out for others. 倾听危险, keeping an eye on anything strange in the pasture, and being the one everyone else looks to for answers. When everyone goes down for a nap in our herd, the alpha horse is always the last to lay down, only when he feels confident everyone is safe.
领导力第三课:领导力不是仗势欺人或屈尊屈尊. 它是关于服务他人，照顾那些依赖你的人.
我花了很长时间慢慢地与德韦德拉斯建立信任，让他完全相信我是一个值得信赖的领导者，他可以跟随. 当他十年前第一次从拖车里出来的时候, 他很年轻, nervous and unsure who he 可以 follow.
Quite frankly, I didn’t know if he 可以 相信我能带领他.
我没有驯马的经验，在任何方面也没有什么宝贵的领导经验. But when I signed the adoption papers for De Vedras, that was a promise to take care of him, 所以在某种程度上, I had to figure it out. Little by little I earned his trust with consistency, 稳定, 最重要的是, 总是让他觉得我能完全控制局面——即使我没有!
在养马的世界里，你可能会听到这样一句话:“这永远不是马的错。.” Because despite their size, 他们的敏感性, their insistence on sometimes pushing 你r buttons, 你的马最终是依靠你来指挥和带领的.
The successes are theirs. The failures are 你rs.
洛里和萨利的经历在很多方面都反映了我和德·维德拉斯的经历. While every relationship between horse and rider is different, many tenets of equine ownership and leadership cross breeds, disciplines and personalities. 无论是阿拉伯马、纯种马、白龙马还是夸特马，基本的教训都是一样的:
“Owning a horse teaches 你 to lead with strength,洛里说，她坚定的信念使她成为一位值得信赖的管理合伙人, “要确定，要冷静, even if 你 may 不 feel confident in that exact moment, 因为你领导的人需要相信你，他们需要知道他们可以信任你.”
You can lead a horse to water, but 你 can’t make him drink.
这是真的. You can’t make a horse do anything. But if 你 respect him, lead with calm authority, and put his well-being first, he 可能 just trust 你 to take a drink.
Interested in learning more about horses? 看看 瑞秋’s articles on horses in Putting the Fact in Fantasy.